Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna

The Yashraj family gather again for another lavish,big budget,glitzy flick filled with beautiful people who laugh, love, fight,sing, dance and last but not least cry copious amounts of tears as they wring emotion out of every dramatic scene and god knows there's plenty in an Indian movie. If that statement sounded like a rant against the genre, it isn't really. It's just that, for this viewer,personally, an excursion into Bollywood every now and then brings home the realisation that opulent song & dance extravaganzas like this is the cinematic equivalent of a bar of milk chocolate for me: to be indulged in every once in awhile as a guilty pleasure, but too much of it make my teeth hurt, my skin itch and my bowels to move. And at the end of it you know it probably wsn't good for you but...God Damn if it wasn't fun while you were indulging in it!

But I digress. Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna(KANK for short)( Never Say Goodbye) is the latest offering of Karan Johar, Bollywood's Box-Office Midas on the strength of 2 previous back-to-back blockbusters "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai"(KKHH for short) and "Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gam". Once again Karan casts his favourite hero(and Numero Uno Star) Shah Rukh Khan who once again acts opposite those 2 lovely and hot actresses,Priety Zinta and Rani Mukherji. And once again,Amitabh Bachan is back as Rani's father-in-law. This gang never play far from each other. After all, Shah Rukh was paired with Preity in her debut Dil Se, she was his heroine in that epic romance "Veer Zaara", where Rani had a supporting role as a lawyer. Preity was also his heroine in "Kal Ho Naa Ho", where Rani had a cameo in a song scene. Rani also cameoed in "Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gaam" (K3G) and was one of RK's heroines in "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai" the other being Kajol who re-paired with the King Khan in K3G and then proceeded to cameo in song scenes in both "Kal Ho Naa Ho" and also KANK. Amitabh was SRK's uncle in "Veer Zaara" and his dad in K3G and he's Rani's father-in-law in KANK where he was her teacher in "Black". Whew! No 6 degrees of separation for the Yash Raj gang more like Zero degrees of togetherness.

So what do they all do here? Let's see, SRK is married to Preety and Rani's about to be married to Abishek Bachan when the movie starts. SRK, a soccer player on a winning streak and about to sign a multi-million dollar contract meets Rani on a park bench outside the mansion(No one lives in modest dwellings in a Karan Johar film) where she's about to get married. You see, she's marrying a childhood friend and is unsure if she feels any love for him.SRK and her talk, he urges her to go through with the wedding ,they get up, walk away and then, in slow motion, pause, turn and look at each other only about 27 times before SRK makes it to the gates outside and is promptly knocked flat on his back by a Merc.

Cut to a few years later,and the Khan is a moody, morose grouch with a limp, his career as the Indian Beckham gone up in smoke. He spends his time taking out his anger at his Uber-successful fashion designer wife and cute son. So, an overall ass-hole, in other words.

Rani is married to Abishek, who's a bit of a man-child still into parties and rock and roll while she STILL feels little passion for him. Via a stupid contrivance, Rani and the Khan meet......

Since the starting scene depicting their meeting has all the subtlety of a pail of ice cold water thrown at you while sleeping in the middle of winter in Siberia, you know without a shadow of a doubt that Rani and the Khan are gonna Get It On, finding friendship,kinship and passion, all the things missing from their respective marriages. The rest of this Looooooong movie(clocking in at an endurance testing 3 and a quarter hours) details the impact of this affair on their spouses and their lives.

The extra-marital affair is a tricky thing to do in movies: the cheating party need to be sufficiently sympathetic to earn audience empathy for what is in essence a very selfish act. And Karan Johar stumbles here: SRK's character is thoroughly unlikable, the typical chauvinist who can't bear his wife's success and Rani's character fares little better, an ice queen who cannot muster an iota of affection for a husband who, childishness aside, truly adores her.But lucky for him, the mega-wattage stars manage to pull it off, SRK on sheer charisma and Rani.....God Bless Her..proves once again that she's truly one of the most talented actresses in Hindi Cinema working today, her eyes effectively conveying her anguish as she tries to stay in a marriage she's drifting further and further away from.

Preity's role isn't as meaty but she does well with the few scraps of dramatic scenes thrown at her.

Abishek turns out to be the most likeable of the lot, his character the most sympathetic and in the tense marital face-offs with Rani, hits the ball out of the park. And his scenes with real life Pa, the Big B is sheer magic as only a real life father-Son duplicating their roles on screen can be.

The Big B has essayed many roles in his long and illustrious career, but the one thing the former Angry Young Man of Hindi cinema has never played is the Dirty Old Man.Well, with KANK he can effectively cross that out of his list as well, as Karan J has him cavorting with nubile Blonde babes a la Hugh Hefner. But his later serious scenes and his growing friendship with SRK's mother show why he's truly one of Hindi Cinema's true Titans. The Big B rocks in all his scenes!

Speaking of rocking, that's exactly what the superb soundtrack by Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy does! Foot-stomping chartbusters mingle easily with melancholy ballads, yes there are shades of their earlier soundtrack of KHNH, but it's still a solid effort.

Music and stars aside, what finally redeems KANK is the gutsy (by Indian movie standards) ending that eschews "traditional" solutions to marital problems. Kudos to Karan J for this.

All in all, an entertaining diversion for a lazy weekend.

This week I read.....

The English Assassin by Daniel Silva

Those bemoaning Len Deighton's hiatus from Spy Fiction or Le Carre's excursion into non-espionage territory could do worse than to reach for Daniel Silva's Gabriel Allon series. The first Allon book, The Kill Artist provided all the requisite items that spy fiction fans relish in the genre: A globe-trotting hunt for a terrorist replete with chases, surveillance, exotic locations, double-crosses and a thrilling climax not to mention sex in the form of the beautiful model/agent Jacqueline Delacroix. All spies moonlight in Silva's book, the hero himself being far more interested in his other vocation as a restorer of priceless art.

But while The Kill Artist Sizzled, Assassin fizzles. It certainly starts out promisingly with Allon being summoned to the home of Swiss Banker Augustus Rolfe for an assignment to restore a painting. But what Gabriel Allon discovers after arriving at the banker's oppulent villa is beyond repair: the dead body of the banker with a bullet through an eye. Caught and interogated by a shifty Swiss Inspector, Allon is bailed out by his sometime boss, Israeli spy master Ari Shamron.
Shamron informs Allon that Rolfe had in fact asked for an agent of the Israeli Intelligence, presumably to divulge vital information that certain dark forces will stop at nothing to prevent. What follows is Allon's quest to uncover the truth aided by Rolfe's beautiful and temperamental daughter who's a world famous violinist.

Switzerland looms large in this book although descriptions of the countries' typically scenic locations are offset by the ugly truth that the Swiss collaborated with the Nazis during World War 2; bankrolling their war-time activities in exchange for priceless arts looted from Jewish owned museums.

It's the sole fascinating aspect of an otherwise pedestrian thriller that limps its way to a lame conclusion. Note that I haven't mentioned the titular character, a killer of English origin residing in Corsica. That's because Silva himself doesn't seem too interested about him , his character set up as the hired killer to terminate Gabriel and Anna, who then proceeds to disappear for much of the book and surfacing towards the end to do something completely out of character. Gabriel himself most improbably devolves from cool spy to Angry Jewish Man in the latter half as the Swiss-Nazi collusion becomes more apparent.

I have 3 more Allon adventures on my bookshelves. It was my intention to delve headlong into them right after this book. But I think I'll take a break from the cloak and dagger stuff for awhile as this thriller singularly failed to thrill.

The Kite Runner

Having done Andre Dubus III's House Of Sand And Fog for our last book discussion, I was struck by it's main protagonist, an Iranian immigrant who fights to retain ownership of his house. Through him, Dubus gives us a fascinating glimpse into Iranian culture and it struck me how similar some of their practices were to Indian customs and traditions. It also hit me how little I know of Middle-Eastern people and their culture, understandable as I hardly read anything written by Middle-Eastern authors. My last exposure to the Muslim world via fiction was several years ago, during my Uni days when I picked up James Clavell's mammoth Whirlwind, a 1000-page plus epic set in Iran detailing the lives of Westen Expatriates and their attempts to get out during the take-over of the Ayatollah. Predictably, the book was from the point of view of an American and Finnish pilot and their "exotic" Persian wives. Characters were drawn in broad strokes with typical ethnic caricatures: Stone- Faced Mullahs and their fanatically lethal soldiers, severely patriarchal families and their subjugated women. I got the picture real quick- Iranian Men: Fanatical Blowhards, Iranian Women: Sultry and Shagedelic!Part of me ignored such stereotyped characterisations as I let myself get swept up in Clavell's phenomenally entertaining epic, an action adventure replete with chases and thrills spiced up the way only a master storyteller like Clavell could. But a part of me longed for a little more meat in the kebabs, so to speak.Enter The Kite Runner, a fascinating novel of Guilt and Redemption set in Afghanistan. Written by Khaled Hosseini, the son of a diplomat who was born in Kabul and whose family was granted political asylum in the US, this is a novel of Afghan characters set for the most part in Afghanistan so there is an air of authenticity in its evocation of places and people.The protagonist Amir, living a privileged life in Kabul, forms a close bond with Hassan, their servant's son. It's a bond that's not so much tested as ripped apart after a vicious incident involving Hassan. Years later, the guilt-wracked Amir, now happily married and a published novelist in America, where he and his father emigrated to after the Soviet invasion of their country, receives a fateful phone call from his father's oldest friend Rahim Khan in Pakistan, asking him a favour, an avenue to purge his guilt. "There is a way to be good again," Rahim Khan tells him. Amirs journeys back to Afghanistan, but the road to redemption is a harsh one....What I loved about this book was the realistic slice of Afghan life Hosseini serves up so expertly. Be it Amir's posh childhood existence in the affluent Wazir Akbar Khan neighbourhood in Northern Kabul, living in a "sprawling house of marble floors and wide windows" with "intricate mosaic tiles, handpicked in Isfahan" covering 4 bathrooms and "gold-stitched tapestries" lining the walls not to mention crystal chandeliers hanging from vaulted ceilings , the "buzkashi" tournaments (throwing an animal carcass into a circle on horseback while other riders knock you off, think Stallone in Rambo III for a clearer picture) , the kite festivals where Hassan's gift for retrieving fallen ones easily earns him the titular monicker or the Kabul Amir returns to several years later as an adult, a city overrun with beggars and buildings with caved in roofs and walls pierced with rocket shells, Hosseini gives you the warts and all view of a once progressive country ravaged by war for the past 25 years.Of course, this being a personal story of Amir's journey, Hosseini doesn't give a historical persepective of events which may cause some bewilderment for those not weaned on Afghanistan's tumultous past. So you may well scratch your head reading a chapter where Amir and Hassan's idyllic evening on July 1973 is suddenly interrupted by gunfire and sirens wailing. The fact that that was the day of the bloodless coup staged by ousted ex-PM Muhammad Daoud to wrest control of power back from PM Muhammad Yusof is never explained. Daoud, cousin to King Zahir Shah who ruled Afghanistan for 40 years, was PM from 1953-1963. Forced to resign over his hard stance with Pakistan, he reclaimed power with the aid of the pro-Moscow communist party PDPA(People's Democratic Party Of Afghanistan). His purging of Islamic parties opposed to him and the assassination of a key PDPA figure resulted this time in a far bloodier coup, the Saur revolution in April 1978. Daoud was killed in the coup and Hafizullah Amin with the aid of the PDPA became the new PM. Splits within the party soon saw Amin at loggerheads with Taraki,leader of the PDPA and another bloody coup in July 1979 had Taraki assassinated. Taraki's assassination angered the Soviet Union who sent troops to Afghanistan in the December of 1979, triggering a 10 year conflict between the Russians and the Mujahideen.It's during this conflict that Amir and his father leave Afghanistan for the US where his father works odd-jobs to put Amir through college. In the Afghan market where they set up stalls to sell knic-knacks, is where Amir glimpses and falls head over heels for the lovely Soraya. Their courtship leading to their eventual betrothal and marriage is an absolutely delightful potrait of the Afghan culture. The chaperone enforced meets, the "what will people say" mentality of Soraya's father and culminating in the lafz( "giving the word") ceremony which bears more than a striking resemblance to orthodox Indian betrothal customs!Hosseini's gift is in sketching characters and their relationships as vividly as the landscape they populate. Amir's guilt, Hassan's devotion and loyalty, Amir's father's strength of character, Amir's relationship with Soraya are expertly conveyed. And in a few short and bold strokes, the writer also manages to hammer home harsh truths, such as the Taliban regime's oppressive hold over a war ravaged country where a woman can be beaten severely for raising her voice. Cheering during soccer matches are not allowed, unless it's for the Taliban executioner who arrives during half-time to stone a couple to death for adultery.The novels' only shortcomings are it's reliances on cinematic devices (especially in the 3rd half)that produces situational coincidences that would make any Bollywood filmmaker proud.But this is a minor gripe in an otherwise searing story of love, loyalty, family and redemption set amidst a landscape often glimpsed only via 30-second video feeds on CNN. Khalid Hosseini opens the doors to his country, people and culture,uniquely Afghan yet endearingly universal. Step in, you won't regret it.

When Nuns Go Bad

Remember The Sound Of Music? Julie Andrews dancing on a hill-top? Now give her a proper habit, age her a little and shove a sharp stick up her ass to inhibit her sense of humour and exuberant joy of life, transforming her into a mean, spiteful sanctimonious little bitch who terrorises girls in a convent, and you get the basic premise for The Nun,released here in Malaysia as Water Spirit. When the girls get their own back and kill her, she returns years later as a spirit to exact her revenge. Not exactly an original concept but in the hands of a better director, this European production could have generated some chills. Instead, it plods its way to a predictable conclusion enlivened only by an itsy bitsy little twist at the end. Most of the actors are Spanish save for 2 who play Americans but in actual fact are English.Since Europeans obviously think the sole requirement to play an American is the ability to punctuate every sentence with "fuck' , the actor who plays one here does precisely that.So-so bargain bin special effects and a few scenes of gore do not lift this above the "watch-only-if -there's-nothing-else-to-see" category. Definitely a wet blanket.

This week I watched.....

Took 2 days off last week to spend some quality time with my Immortal Beloved who had the WHOLE week off before starting her new job.As fate would have it,got chop-sockied by the flu virus and armed with antibiotics and a comfy couch and lotsa TLC from my IB,settled down to watch and re-watch movies from my by now gargantuan DVD collection:

Thursday: V For Vendetta Love this Vigorous and occasionally Violent flick about a Vocal and Valorous Vigilante on a Vengeful Crusade against a Vile and Venal Government,aided by a Vivacious Vixen.Verbal Volleys,Vicious Villains and Virtuoso Action.Vunderbah!

Friday:The Sixth Sense Psychiatrist Bruce Willis counsels intense young boy who sees "dead people".M.Night Shyamalan's debut is still his most layered and emotionally honest work to date.With sterling performances from Toni Collette and Haley Joel Osment and a wonderfully restrained turn from Mr.Die Hard himself,this slow but never boring supernatural flick is a winner in my book.And it's a great re-watch even after you know the by-now-talked-to-death TWIST at the end.

Friday: From Hell A ripping Yarn,if you'll pardon the pun.An adaptation of Alan Moore's graphic novel about the infamous serial killer who terrorised the Whitechapel district in Victorian London.Johnny Depp plays an opium-snorting clairvoyant dick investigating 'Ol Jack's handiwork which begins with stabbing a prostitute before graduating to mutilating,dismembering and relieving his subsequent victim's of their internal organs.Gritty,atmospheric and chilling with enough slash and hack to satisfy this jaded fan of the genre,the Hughes Brothers(why haven't they done anything since then?) have produced a compellingly watchable flick.I first caught this on an atrocious VCD copy,upgraded it to a watchable VCD copy before finally adding this to my DVD collection.

Saturday: Total Recall It's double trouble for Arnie all the way here as people start to chase him both on Earth and in Mars while the Governator juggles not one but 2 Femme Fatales and has to outwit evil Ronny Cox and also his vicious Numero Uno henchman Michael Ironside.Ah-Nuld dreams he's actually a secret agent on Mars trying to foil an evil dictator's reign of oppression while attempting to unlock a secret that could threaten the Red Planet's very existence.Then he realises ..hey he really IS a secret Agent.Baddies tell him..no you're dreaming.He knows he isn't..or does he? I LOVE Paul Verhoeven's movies and this follow up after the awesome Robocop is butt-kicking action all the way while tantalisingly teasing you with the is-it-all-a-dream-or-not scenario.Chalk this one right alongside Terminator and Predator as one of the Austrian muscleman's more cerebral action flicks.

Saturday: True Lies Secret Agent doesn't tell his wife what he does.Baddies kidnap someone close to him and there's an awesome action sequence on a bridge...not it's not Mission:Impossible 3 although watching this flick will remind you how much this summer's Tom Cruise Show ripped off this far superior James Cameron movie.

Sunday: Unbreakable If M.Night Shyamalan had done X-Men or Spider-Man this is what it would have been like.Slow,intense but nevertheless gripping,this assured tale of a man slowly discovering his powers and mission in life is compellingly watchable. Ironically,the by-now-patented Shyamalan twist at the end is for me the weakest aspect of an otherwise solidly plotted suspense drama.

Sunday: Underworld:Evolution Kate Beckinsale,tight leather..enough said.Any questions?Oh yeah...somewhere in between the ancient feud between vampires and werewolves continue.....

MURUGAN LOVES SIEW BEE

The graffitti above wasn't scrawled on a public toilet door or the walls of an abandoned shoplot.I saw it in....hold your breath... Batu Caves!!!Yes, in addition to a gigantic statue of Lord Murugan towering above the temple entrance and a once a year carnival of body piercing freaks masquerading as a religious festival,the Caves can now boast of graffitti,making it one of the hippest places of worship around.It already owns the distinction of being the world's only temple that doubles as an exercise gym for cardio workouts.When I took my mother there last week,the number of track shoes and shorts-wearing Chinese aunties trekking up the 200 odd steps to the top of the cave entrance outnumbered sari-clad women like my mom making the same climb to worship in the temples inside.As my mother and aunt waited inside the temple sanctum for the prayers to finish,my Immortal Beloved and I climbed up the last flight of stairs located inside the cave to another smaller temple above.Bells were ringing,religious mantras were being chanted,the air was heavy with the smell of incense as we walked around the temple perimeter,my thoughts remarkably pure as such places tend to make them,when I chanced upon the undying declaration of love scratched into the walls behind the temple.The odd, infrequent meditations on life and religious faith which were preoccupying me at that time flew out of my mind like bats out of a cave to be replaced with the much more common exclamation:"What the fuck????"
What is one to make of this?It says Murugan loves Seiw Bee.As the temples here are dedicated to Lord Muruga,am I to surmise that the graffitti was a Chinese girl's declaration of her divine love for the deity(not uncommon in Hindu mythology.Mirabhai carried a similar life-long devotion to Lord Krishna) or should I conclude that the caves now function as a catalyst for inter-racial romance? Should I even be surprised that a brother deep in prayer would get distracted by a sexy Ah Moi in micro-mini running shorts relaxing after her cardio workout up the steps.There were enough of them mingling with the worshippers on that day.
So here's an ad for temple committee members in Batu Caves worried about dwindling numbers of devotees when it's not Thaipusam.
Come To Batu Caves:Jog up it's stairs to burn those calories,relax in the cooling confines of it's caves as you cuddle up to your loved one.
Love often resides in treacherous waters.Throw in racial differences and said waters can be extremely difficult to navigate so divine help is the way to go!We've conveniently set up temples inside for this very purpose.So break a coconut ,ring a bell, say your prayers and scrawl your romantic epistle on the walls provided(sharp stones for scratching are freely available) .
Remember:Murugan Loves YOU

Tristan & Isolde

I love medieval epics.The clang of swords,the woosh of bow and arrow in bloody battles,the costumes,scenery..all these make even the corniest sword & sandal epic work for me .Gladiator,Troy,Kingdom Of Heaven are all must-haves in my DVD collection.Add to this Tristan & Isolde,based on the old Arthurian legend of star-crossed lovers.This movie had so little publicity only a chance visit to the Rotten Tomatoes website made me aware of it.And my main reason for grabbing the DVD was the fact that it's directed by Kevin Reynolds who helmed "Robin Hood:Prince Of Thieves" and "The Count Of Monte Cristo" so the dude has a good track record for films with men in tights.The former is still delightfully entertaining after all these years and the latter still worth a watch thanks to Guy Pierce's slimy turn as the villain.I first came across this story in an old book in my collection called "King Arthur and The Knights Of The Round Table". In the book,Tristan was one of the strongest of King Arthur's knights who falls in love with Isolde who unfortunately is betrothed to the cowardly King Mark of Cornwall.Knowing she could never be happy with the King,her maidservant hides a jug of magic portions on the boatride to Cornwall with the idea that the King and Isolde would each drink from it and fall in love with one another(it's that kind of portion,see).Unfortunately Tristan,who was also escorting Isolde to Cornwall and hence in the boat as well,discover the jug and he and Isolde drink from it,intensifying their love for one another,making his duty to hand her over to the king that much harder.Yes,all very tragic indeed.The movie takes generous liberties with the story chief among which is the complete jettisoning of the whole Round Table business.The England potrayed is one of the Dark Ages,where the Irish reign supreme and the rest of England consists of warring tribes(not unlike Antoine Fuqua's King Arthur last year).The Irish rule with an iron fist,hacking and killing all who rebel.In one such bloody slaughter,young Tristan's father who was planning to unite the English tribes against the Irish are slain.Tristan is adopted by King Mark of Cornwall,grows into a dashing and strong warrior.I say dashing and strong because that's what the filmmakers would have us believe although James Franco looks like he could comfortably step into any of a dozen American Teen Soapies with a change of clothing and a hair-cut.While everyone around him is suitably grizzled,muddy and dirty as befits the accepted standard of hygiene during medieval times,Tristan is clean, shaven & coiffed.It's Rufus Sewell's King Mark who wins points for being the "Real Man" of the epic,even minus 1 hand,as he not only looks tough,but exhibits class,nobility and courage when Tristan screws around with his wife,Isolde.See,during an earlier attack by the Irish which left our hero mortally wounded,thinking him dead,they push him out to sea where he comfortably sails into a deserted beach in Ireland,where,naturally Isolde,the daughter of the Irish king,finds him.Naturally as he's cold from all that time at sea,she strips and cuddles him for warmth.Naturally,she tells her maid to strip as well which,if this were a porn flick,would have led to an excellent 3-way shag-a-thon.But Isolde waits till Tristan is healed while hiding him away in deserted hut,before giving him a taste of Irish "hospitality".Tristan heals and heads home.When he is asked to partake in a tournament to win the Irish King's daughter as a prize for King Mark,our hero is flabbergasted to find that said daughter is none other than Isolde(silly girl didn't tell him who she was,see).So Tristan takes her back to Cornwall,she cries,he pouts and she marries the king.But hormones will be hormones,and before you can say "adultery",Tristan & Isolde are doing the Wild Thing amidst secret rendezvous and snatched moments during banquets.Of course,Isolde,being the dutiful wife she is,also performs her nuptial duties to King Mark at night,which,if this were a porn flick,would make her something of a medieval Jenna Jameson.Later there is betrayal,scheming among the warlords and a final battle with the wicked Irish King all played out very melodramatically.All in all,quite watchable thanks to some breath-taking Celtic scenery,some decent battle-scenes(rendered mild,unfortunately by the infernal PG-13 rating),a great performance by Sophia Myles and Rufus Sewell.

An Offer I Can't Refuse

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/em/fr/-/2/hi/europe/4899512.stm >The Mafia.My fascination with them is endless.Having finished(finally) reading Mario Puzo's acclaimed "The Godfather" and watching yet again on DVD,Francis Ford Coppola's legendary cinematic adaptation of the book,I'm hooked on the mob.Part of it has to do with the sheer style and narrative momentum of the plot.I'm a sucker for the "pacifist forced to take up arms" tale and The Godfather has a delightful spin on it:Michael Corleone,the lone "White Sheep"(wants nothing to do with the family "business",went to college and is a decorated war hero) of the powerful Corleone clan of New York,is forced into the business when pop,powerful Don Vito Corleone is gunned down by a rival family.Michael shoots the plotter,flees to Sicily,leaving his WASP girlfriend behind.In the meantime,back home,war escalates between rival families,killing hot tempered older brother Sonny.Micahel returns home,assumes command and after the (natural)death of his father,exacts swift,brutal revenge on his enemies.Ironically,I found Puzo's writing rather pedestrian with nothing leaping off the pages and grabbing me.What gives the novel it's immense pull is the fascinating insight into a world that is at once shadowy,labyrinthine and brutal juxtaposed with the day to day life and loves of a traditional,extended Italian American family,something Puzo gives an authentic feel too,being Italian himself.The movie is another matter:Francis Ford Coppola layers it with oodles of style,pulling of the casting coup of the century and populating the screen with a near flawless ensemble of thespians looking like they were born to play the parts;can you imagine anyone else but James Caan as Sonny,Robert Duvall as Tom Hagen,Marlon Brando as Vito Corleone and last but not least Al Pacino as Michael Corleone?Watching it again in a pristine,restored version via DVD has only enhanced my enjoyment of this Mob Masterpiece.

Sound Bites

2 things I read about Indonesia over the weekend has me scratching my head1.Playboy to go on sale sans nudie pics: What's the fucking point??????What's next?Fully clothed Sports Illustrated editions???This is the end of civilisation as we know it!2. The Keep-Em-In-Yer-Pants Brigade over there is thinking of clamping down on lovers who maintain physical contact in public for more than 5 minutes.So a future scene in the park might go something like this:He: Darling,let's do it.She: Do you have protection?He:(Pointing to his wristwatch) of course sweetheart.She:But....does it have a stopwatch?He: Stopwatch and timer with buzzer honey buns!You can never be too careful.She:Ok..set it for 5 minutes then.He: Better 4:58 must factor in the Separation Speed.

The Code Conquers

http://books.guardian.co.uk/danbrown/story/0,,1749361,00.htmlI for one am as pleased as punch that Leigh and Baigent had to eat crow and go home with their academic tails tucked beween their legs.As a book,DVC fulfilled most major requirements for a thriller although it's pedestrian writing and colourless characters left me cold.But more to the point of this discussion:Ideas presented in DVC,whether packaged haphazardly within a routine run-of-the mill thriller(as what was done by Dan Brown),or woven seamlessly into a exciting tension-filled plot with superior writing by a more accomplished practisioner of the craft,have been floating about in academic and religious texts for decades.What I'm sure irked Mr.Leigh and Mr.Baigent and a good many other people I reckon is the fact that their "academic" work using the Grail theory was moderately successful while Brown's packaging of it has netted him the GDP of a small nation!Leigh and Baigent wanted a piece of the lucrative Da Vinci pie.Can't blame them.Who wouldn't?But to tar Mr.Brown with the plagiarist's brush for ideas long floating in the public domain is a tad too much.Anyway,thanks to the publicity surrounding this case,the plaintiffs should see sales of their books increasing substantially,just in time to pay their lawyers!

Sheep Herding Was Never More Fun!

Finally caught Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain a few weeks ago.It comes bedecked with a plethora of plaudits and praise gushing out from every known multimedia forum building to a tidal wave of acclaim of tsunami-like proportions ,capped by Lee's Best Director Win at the Oscars recently.I love Ang Lee's movies.Except for the hard-to-obtain "The Ice Storm" I have all his English language movies occupying pride of place in my DVD collection.His ability to immerse you in a culture is so complete it's easy to forget that he's equally foreign to it."Sense & Sensibility"'s exquisite Victorian drama so brought to life the world of Jane Austen you could be forgiven for thinking it was directed by a tweed-wearing,pipe smoking blighter called Nigel.The amazing and much derided "The Hulk" was awash with a comic fan's exuberance for the medium normally demonstrated by the likes of a Sam Raimi or Bryan Singer.But Brokeback Mountain failed to engage me completely and it's definitely not Lee's best movie(I reserve that honour for "Crouching Tiger,Hidden Dragon" his masterful tribute to Wu Xia flicks while deliciously subverting the genre's cliches)Brokeback,like Lee's earlier American Civil War Drama "Ride With The Devil",takes you deep into the American South,circa the 1960s where 2 cowboys ,Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal) and Ennis Del Mar (Heath Ledger) meet in the summer of 1963 when both are hired by Joe Aguirre (Randy Quaid) to be sheepherders on Wyoming's Brokeback Mountain. Jack's wordy,Enis is laconic,the days are long and the nights cold and lonely.So what are 2 cowpokes supposed to do to kill the boredom,exacerbated by a 100% woman-free landscape stretching many miles in all directions with nothing between them but sheep,running creeks and tall Wyoming grass??Well,fret not animal lovers,no sheep are violated(save one,for culinary purposes) as our 2 studs proceed to re-define the terms "Male Bonding". That rumbling sound you hear is John Wayne,Charles Bronson and Lee Van Cleef rolling collectively in their graves! Yup! Before you can say Yee-Haw,Enis is up at the crack of Jack,and suddenly the nights ain't lonely no more,you dig?But,it's the 60s,it's the South,so setting up house together and walking hand in hand to the nearest barn dance is not an option so they go their separate ways.Thankfully our 2 studs show no aversion to women as Enis and Jack proceed to marry,bed and impregnate Alma (Michelle Williams) and Lureen (Anne Hathaway),respectively.Jack rekindles the relationship via a postcard to Enis which sets off a twenty year clandestine relationship conducted atop the titular mountain all under the guise of fishing trips.While Lureen remains blisssfully unaware of Jack's occasional switch to the 'other' team,Alma suspects all is not right with her mumbling hubby.Sure,he punches out guys who are rude to her and the kids and brings home the bacon but:1) The numerous "fishing " expeditions with Jack yield nary a fish.2) He loves taking her from the rear and lastly,3) Glimpses her man and Jack snogging each others lips off in the backyard (one of the movie's very rare lapses into artificiality.You'd think 2 gay cowpokes in the 60s would make damn sure they were alone with the doors double pad-locked before trading saliva)And so the movie proceeds,sloooooooooooooooowly as the affair takes them into their middle ages and impacts their lives and relationships with wives,in laws and children.It's not only the languid pace I have a problem with but the understatement that pervades many of the scenes that should have sucker punched me with their dramatic impact.As a result,when the inevitable tragedy occurs,it lacks the emotional resonance to truly pull you in.Still,there's great scenery and brilliant performances overall.And a realistic slice of Southern life.As for me,the sooner Lee gets cracking on the Hulk or Crouching Tiger sequel the better.No matter his slight miss-step here,I ain't quitting Ang Lee anytime soon.

The Beginning

For my random ramblings on movies,books,music and anything else that catches my fancy or annoys the living piss outta me!